Malaprops

Yesterday, I had to stop by the post office to drop off a package. 

I almost said to myself "I am going to the postING office." That was something my dad used to say. 

Posting office instead of Post Office. Said for no other reason than to entertain himself. Harmless humor. Family lore.

In the months since my dad passed away, I've thought about his use of malaprops from time to time. It was his nerdy-engineer sense of humor coming out.

For instance:

• Instead of a turkey sandwich, he'd fix himself a TURN-KEY sandwich
• In springtime, he referred to the local celebration as the Dogwood SMARTS Festival instead of ARTS
• When he was grilling, he'd tell us he was grilling some SNAKES rather than STEAKS

Harmless humor

I never practiced the art of malapropism, personally, but it is time-honored device played for humor in the arts and entertainment. 

Stand-up comedian Norm Crosby was noted for using malaprops as his signature. Barney Fife, of Mayberry fame, often used the wrong phrase when he was trying to impress people. And in Shakespeare's "A Midsummer Night's Dream," the venerable character, Bottom, is the author's comedic relief with his frequent misuse of language. 

Not that Nick (my dad) was referencing any of those individuals when he intentionally misspoke. But, he did enjoy some good wordplay.

For instance, vehicles: He described his Ford F-250 "camper special" as the "pick-me-up truck" (or alternately, the pick'm-up truck). His vintage 1966 Ford Mustang was often called "the horsestang."

And in the world of retail and restaurants, his beloved Sears and Roebuck–where he worked as a college student and later, frequently shopped–became "Sears Bucks." The old K-Mart store was known was "Kentucky Mart." And if you wanted to get a quick burger, you might stop by the "Golden Starches" (instead of Golden Arches). His computer was not a Dell, but a Dull.

These sorts of unique personality quirks add breadth and depth to a cherished person. They add a touch of humanity.

You may have someone in your life who does something unique. An uncle who whistles while he works. A friend who occasionally skips. Or an ex-partner who was pleasantly forgetful. I once had a date with a woman who referred to a turn indicator as a "clicker" and windshield wipers as "swishers."

Clickers and swishers. That always makes me smile, too.

I don't think of Nick's tick as one of his main traits but I do, occasionally, recall one of those malaprops as colorful side notes of his personality.

For example, when I was at the "posting office" yesterday, I walked right by the self-service K'eye Osk (kiosk). And I smiled.

JG