Editor’s Note – This is the first of a two-part series about our weekend trip to Marshall County, MS to dedicate a grave marker for my great grandmother, Mary Valentine Carpenter.
The road to the Pittman Cemetery comes to an abrupt halt.
Also known as Duckett Road or Jordan Cemetery Road, it just stops with a field and a fence in front of it and a smaller, barbed wire fence off to the left. If you move the post aside, you can drive up a small gravel road – which is the continuation of Jordan (pronounced Jer-dun) Cemetery Road.
On Saturday morning I made that drive as I have done two times before during this recent quest I’ve told you about (most recently in Thursday’s edition). This trip was more like a pilgrimage, you might say. And this time, I brought along close family members in addition to Lisa – my dad, my mother, my sister and my daughter.
We were carrying precious cargo.
My folks had arranged for the production of a grave marker for Mary Valentine Carpenter and our trip, on Saturday, was for the expressed purpose of placing the marker and dedicating it to the memory of this lady who has become so special to us over the course of the last year as we have learned more about her life and times.
A number of friends we have met in Marshall County have become special to us over the course of the last year as well. Marie and Billie, who own the field at the end of Duckett Road, have greeted us warmly and welcomed us as visitors since we first met after my letter to the editor was published in the local newspaper, The South Reporter.
Marie told me, by phone, last week that she was proud of us for remembering Mary. She helped to spread the word in the community about what we are doing. Then, she and Billie met us and he opened the gate to allow us to drive that extra distance on Jordan Cemetery Road.
I introduced all my family members to our friends and then we got to work. As I described to you back in January, and also last fall, it is somewhat tricky to find your way to the actual cemetery site. But, once we got there, it was easy to find the field stones we had discovered nine months ago.
We don’t know for sure – and I guess we never will – exactly where Mary is. But, taking our best guess, we stepped off a few feet to the left of the headstone and dug a shallow hole that we then filled with quick-setting concrete. When we were confident we had the right about of mortar, we set the marker. And then we filled in dirt around the edges to finish the job.
About that time Kitty - another friend I have met through this discovery – dropped by. She has helped spread the word as well. Kitty and I also talked by phone last week and we also exchanged emails.
As we finished setting the stone my dad said, in his very understated voice, “Well, Mary. I never knew you. But, you finally have a stone.” What a poignant way of summing up the past two years.
It’s true: we never knew Mary. We heard about her through oral history and we learned more through formal communication channels. Last fall, I received a copy of her death certificate. Earlier, we found the records that brought us to the Pittman Cemetery.
We were all determined to make sure her selfless sacrifice and the role she played in all our lives would not be forgotten. I said as much during my brief remarks and prayer to dedicate the marker.
My sister took photos. Holly and Lisa helped ferry materials to the site and, when we were ready for the dedication, they brought my mom into the woods so she could join for this personal and sacred moment. We were thrilled our friends were there, too.
Under a beautiful October sky, 100 years to the day Mary died, we dedicated a grave marker in her honor. As we drove home, we were tired but very content.
It was a good thing we did. And in the process, we met some new friends who we will continue to treasure as we continue to move forward in this journey to learn more about our roots and our family ties.
JG
Originally posted 10/6/2014
No comments:
Post a Comment