Vive La Différence

The French expression, Vive La Différence, means long live the difference (between the sexes). In other words, it is a statement that affirms the fact the genders are not the same and that this is, indeed, a good thing.

The statement can apply to various aspects of life. Generally, the guy is out back grilling while the lady is putting the finishing touches on the meal. In many cases, the lady is responsible for deciding how to arrange the room while the guy is dragging the bookcase from this wall to the other.

For another example, have you seen the latest Home Depot tv spot? It’s called ‘The Bath You Want.’ She asks him which bathroom vanity he prefers - #A or #B? He verbalizes his preference for #A. She shoots him a look as if to say, “Wrong answer!” He quickly changes his opinion and says #B

Later, after they buy and install it, she tells him, “Good choice!”

Speaking of verbalization, back in the winter, there were numerous reports about research showing why women are generally more  talkative than men. The science says it’s really true. You’ve heard about ‘Chatty Cathy’; have you ever met Chatty Charlie?

Anyway, you can list your own examples of how “Vive La Différence” exists and why that is a good thing.

Over the course of this summer, I have determined that grocery shopping is one area in which the genders take diverse approaches. I shared this idea when we were having dinner with a male friend, recently, and he agreed that things are the same in his household.

While it is good and fun for Lisa and I to do a number of things together, I’ve concluded that grocery shopping is not one of them. In other words, “Vive La Différence” can also mean two divergent approaches to a trip to the local supermarket.

She sees it as an event; an experience to savor. She is deliberate and thoughtful. She wants to go up and down every aisle and consider each purchase carefully.

He sees it as a task; a chore. It is a battlefield to conquer and a war to win. Ten items on the list. Check off each one. Criss-cross the store in rapid fashion and get out as quickly as possible.

You can see how the ‘she’ approach and the ‘he’ approach just don’t mix.

For example, I don’t need a lengthy process to determine which cereal I am going to purchase – Special K or Great Grains (or in some cases, Fruity or Cocoa Pebbles).

And don’t even get me started about yogurt purchases. Let’s just say one of us thinks a LOT more about the stuff than the other does.

Anyway, what it all means is that a trip to the supermarket is really her forte. She has a style and a system. She does not want to be rushed. She shops with panache.

I can appreciate that. It simply would not be my approach to the procurement of foodstuffs. And that’s ok.

So, let’s summarize: both techniques work. They’re just different. And that brings me back to my original point.

I love the differences; I celebrate the differences; I want the differences to continue. 

I may just cede the grocery shopping to her.

JG

Originally posted 8/13/2013