Code of Conduct

One of the things I am most proud of from my time in ‘the oughts’ as President of Farragut Baseball, Inc. was our commitment to creating a positive environment for all concerned – most notably for the kids,

Before I became the prez, I observed a lot of things I wanted to fix and once I got access to the bully pulpit, I went to work in concert with our Board. Fortunately, we found our efforts were well received. They were like a line drive base hit.

 

But once we got to first base, we needed to go further. We expanded our by-laws and tied them in with our Code of Conduct. Then, we rolled out this manifesto, of sorts, to all the coaches in our league to get their buy-in.

One of our goals in the process was to create a positive experience for the youngsters in the league.  Every coach was required to read the Code of Conduct and sign a copy. We didn’t mince words, either. The first line on the printed Code said it all:

There will be zero tolerance for use of foul or abusive language.

We also placed metal signs with the same general message on the chain link fences on each of the fields around the park to help reinforce the message.

For the most part, I think we succeeded…but all it takes is that one guy.

As fall baseball ramps up and as youth football and soccer get underway, thousands of youngsters all across the country will return to the field for another season of the youth sport of their choice. They are geared up for success.

We used to have a saying in FB, Inc.: “Everything’s fine as long as the kids are just playing. But, the problems occur when you get the parents involved!”

I read an article a friend of mine posted on Facebook today that reminded me of this fact. The piece brought back a lot of memories.

I enjoyed reading the Aussie article and especially took note of the unique phrases like car park and bloody.

Still, in terms of what I am writing tonight, I felt like I probably needed to go a search for some American articles to confirm my point. As much as we tried 5 years ago in Farragut Baseball, Inc. to root out boorish behavior, the literature tells us it exists - not necessarily in our community but all over. 

Parents yell at their kids. The question is…why?

I think, for one thing, it is an ego thing. Dad wants Little Johnny to do well and if he does well, Dad looks good. If he doesn’t…Dad takes it personally. Secondly, we’re an overly competitive society. “No time for losers…we are the champions…” and all that.

We had one dad on our team who wanted his Little Johnny to pitch. So, okay, Johnny’s gonna pitch. That wasn’t enough.

Dad parked his lawn chair right by home plate just behind the backstop. That gave him the perfect vantage point. He rode him the whole game and when he wasn’t yelling at his son, he was yelling at the catcher for not blocking a ball in the dirt or yelling at the teenage umpire-in-training for not calling a particular pitch a strike.

Turns out, this guy was just unhappy at the world. His marriage wasn’t going well and he wasn’t happy. So, he let ‘Junior’ bear the brunt. 

Another guy I remember was an instigator. It wasn’t enough that he yelled at his “Little Johnny” (he did of course). He took it personally and wanted everyone to know.

One night, I remember his kid wasn’t doing so well and he yelled something to the effect of “I’m embarrassed to be taking you home tonight…” That sells it all, doesn’t it?

You may not be shocked to learn that he was ‘one and done’ with our team.

Anyway, those bad apples are few and far between. We had many more happy post-game huddles than not with our team and far more wins than losses.

 

We were pretty blessed in Farragut. There wasn’t a lot of that kind of behavior. We saw a LOT more of it at other parks where, maybe, there wasn’t an emphasis on a Code of Conduct.

One other thought before I close.

I used to tell coaches that wins and losses, in the tradition sense, didn’t really matter. Twenty years from now, no one will remember whether you won the game last night or lost it. The boys will remember the fun, the friendships and how they are treated.

You don’t want to be the coach who is known for being ‘the yeller.’ You don’t want to be the coach that caused Little Johnny to hang up his spikes.

The same comment applies to parents.

The true way you measure success in youth sports is by determining if everyone had fun and if all your players return for the next season. If they all come back next season, you know you were successful!

Our Choppers are off at college or starting their senior years in high school, so they won’t be on the fields tonight but another generation of young athletes are suiting up right about now.

As the fall sports season unfolds, here’s hoping that everyone has a fun and safe season and that everyone wants to come back and play again next spring!

JG

Originally posted 8/22/2013